THE FALLEN DUCHESS

They call me Ms. Slip coz i tend to trip but i'm never falling in love and outta love,

See i was the typa chic the guys called hardcore,

You know, the type that you had to down a couple of shots to try out for,

I was wild, untamed,

A lil' mysterious, a lil' complex,I was invincible!

Until... i met him...

The memory of our first encounter remains sweet on my mind like honey dipped strawberries,

He, he had me at hallo,

I just had to know...Who is he?

Who is this man with devouuring eyes that burn deep,

Eyes that see right through my soul,

I was a prisoner of his gaze,

Before him i stood bare, naked,dainty,

Seperated from him by the flames of passion fanned furiously by our lust,

I was hot!

Hot for him,

Hot because of him,

Hot everything plus him!

But instead of letting us burn,

He asked if he could walk with me,

Hold my hand and just talk with me,

He asked if he could kiss my mind with his words,

Open up it's pores to freedom, so it find home,

I said yes!

I remeber losing myself in those big brown eyes,

Like an X on a map of a patch of land pregnant with hidden treasure,

I was stuck on his every word!

Rooted to where i stood,

One with the earth,

Top soil on unconquered him,

I was taken!

The man was fresh,

Like morning dew dripping down rose petals' chins,

He seemed to cool my soul from within and without it showed,

I smiled,

Beemed at his attention,

His liking for me,

Before my eyes he shone like a thousand balls of light bouncing from soul to soul,

Yet my soul he chose to make beautiful,

To colour me fly with his radiance...

He said i was his new constellation,

Earthly because i forwent my place amongst the firmament of the cosmos so that i could brighten up his life,

And though he was slightly intoxicated by my presence,

He would be sure to call if i gave him my number...

It all happened so fast,

Numbers were exchanged,

Goodbyes were said and an elated I took a long cab drive home,

Hoping,

Wanting,

Seething with a raw desire for fleshly presence,

A desire for him...

The invincible was finally conquered...

I USED TO LOVE HIM

See I used to love him,

When his, words were less slick,

And his mind was less thick,

When, truth happened to be the only portion of his speech,

And someway, somehow, my heart he would always reach,

Back when we were such jailbirds caged in each other's love,

And that prison in our hearts was all we were thinking of,

If i cud paint a picture of how we was,

I would be the canvas n he would be the brush,

So that he cud colour me fly,

N my oh my!

We were good together,

Like, rainbows, fly in any weather,

Sorta like Bonnie and Clyde,

Only less vile,

But our love was criminal alright,

Like that, one drug u sniff up insane,

Yet somehow it all started to change.

He who was once my sun now dimmed out into the dark,

Took everything n left me alone with my soul,

Half a soul but a soul all in all,

I was spared!

From living a lie,

From having a bootleg version of love carefully packaged as him,

I was spared!

From picking up after him,

Pretending i enjoyed his sloberry kisses,

I was spared!

And though i'm picking up the pieces of my fragmented soul,

I was spared!

They say that love chooses what to see,

But when the scales fell from my eyes, child!

I realized i was blind!

Loving him for all the wrong reasons,

Needing him by my side through whatever season,

When yet, his heart, his mind, his body longed to be warming another womans bed.

I was played a fool on the stage of his life,

So it wasn't my cue to call for the curtain closing.

Do i hate him?

No! Yet i wish i did so that things would end differently,

They would end my way,

But i chose the road less travelled,

I chose to seek for healing,

To, purge my heart, my soul and mind of his bile,

And when the healing came,

I boxed up all the dead emotions and returned them to sender,

I, I finally understood it all,

It was never me to begin with,

Sure, i put my blood, my bones, my life into it all,

If you ask me,I'mma tell u that I used to love him,

But now,

Now I don't,

Now I don't...

MY FAIR MAIDEN

Her voice so sweet,

Can bring tears to angels' eyes,

For she is pure,

Fashioned by the hands of God Himself,

Moulded into perfection reflecting eternity at first glance.

I have heard her sweet voice knock on the door of my heart,

Only to open it and find she has left,

Leaving behind faint traces of her scent,

But her beautiful melody still lingers,

"Find me and you shall find you..."

"Find me and you shall find you..."

Leaving all things behind,

I go in pursuit of her,

A journey filled with doubt, confusion, fear and discouragement,

But one that will lead me to her.

I am glad for i am not alone in my pursuit,

The Hand that has written all gives me directions,

Promptings that guide my steps,

Omens that i can read and sense,

And with each step i am a breath away from my fair maiden.

In her eyes i see fragments of my littered soul,

In part but pieces of me all in all,

I feel like i have known her all my life,

As though she has brushed against my skin in passing before,

And the memory is stuck on my mind,

It keeps me pressing on.

So i heed destiny's sweet call,

For she is my maiden,

My fair, sweet maiden,

I listen to my heart for its language i know,

And to the wind i blow a kiss,

To carry it and pray that it find me,

And blow gently against my face in the near time i see,

When i stand before her,

And come face to face with me,

When i finally embrace my destiny...

This poem is in the introduction of the soon to be best seller called THE LOST LAWS OF SUCCESS by Geneva Musau. The book will be released sometime October and book signings will be conducted. I'll fill you in.Blessings

IN MY SKIN . . . Miss Duchess ♫

A cold world i roam forlorned,

Insecure,

Conscious,

For i am branded,

Assigned a name and required to fit the bill,

To find home in it,

To own it,

To embrace the identity given me.

I live in constant fear of mirrors,

So i choose to remain blind,

For i fear that they too shall resound,

That i am imperfect,

That my flaws are my only perfection,

That i can never be beautiful,

In my skin.

I awake each morning and choose a facard,

Something to shelter me from the world,

Something to help me through the day,

Something to hide the pain,

Something to bar my tears,

Something to hold my smile,

Till i can go back home,

And break where no one can see.

In the comfort of these four walls,

These four walls that are my bathroom,

My heart suffers violence,

There before that mirror,

I am tormented by voices,

Fat,

Ugly,

Overweight,

Less than perfect,

And as a weary soldier,

I stomach the beatings from the world,

And retire to bed a depleted soul.

Even in my dreams i am held captive,

Lost in the warpings of others,

Chasing after the fading image of a more perfect me,

Elusive and running, hiding in a maze,

The image of me i am trying to embrace,

A me that is jaded by my bruised esteem.

The light of the day is the bane of my life,

It is then that i am reminded of my form,

Then the struggle that haunted me yesterday,

Becomes real again,

Brushing up the back of my neck,

Grining at me for i am impotent in it's clutch,

Flashing before me images of what lies in store,

For it knows that i am helpless.

Do not judge me,

For despising myself,

For seeking to be different,

For hating the person i am,

In this skin,In my skin,

For i know that you too fall victim,
To a world hungry for comparison.

My tears have run dry,

My cries cannot save me,

I am bound,

Trapped in between who i think i am,

And who i want to be,

A prisoner of the paradigms chaining my mind,

Lost in this warped reality.

Shall i choose to be jailed forever in my fear?

Shall i let my insecurities feed off my soul,

And slowly kill my spirit?

Or shall i fight to redeem what the world stole,

From me,

a helpless soul?

I know somewhere deep down inside,

I love myself for who i am,

I know that i am unique,

That there is only one me,

A me that can truly be,

In my skin.

Therefore i choose,

I choose to free my mind,

From the captivity of the voices of the world,

From myself,

I choose to listen to the Voice of God,

Of He who fashioned me so wonderfully,

Of He who can restore the love of myself,

Of He who calls me child,

In this skin...

It is a journey,

One that i choose to walk all my life,

The voices of the world may not cease,

Insecurities may find crevices in my life,

And creep in again seeking a home,

And i may fall in the same hole again,

In my moments of weakness,

But this one thing i know,

As long as the Most High lives,

I shall embrace the truth,

Truth that says that i am beautiful,

Yes,

Beautiful,

In my skin...